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Woman of the Month

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This WOMEN'S VIEW section is dedicated to the gender-biased feedback we have received from women prior to October 2008 (when we added a COMMENT SECTION to the bottom of each Midlife Article and ASK MIDLIFE BACHELOR question/answer. We've kept the pre-October 2008 WOMEN'S VIEW section here for historical purposes, because we did receive a lot of excellent feedback.  Here is a quick pre-October 2008 index of the types of feedback some of our female readers have given us. Please also see our Reader Feedback page for other feedback, too.

     Midlifebachelor.com is a great site for those who need to vent out issues
     Harshest Criticism EVER about MidlifeBachelor.com - on the Midlife Forum
     Online Dating Not Bad - Just Be Careful
     5 Types of People who Date Online (from a Woman's Perspective)

     Reasons Why a Woman Stops Communicating with You

     Lying Men make Women Crazy

     Why Women/People in general are Crazy
     Difference between Managing and Controlling
     High Profile Female Author/TV Personality Finds Some
             Content Here Cheap & Distasteful

     Are Men's Supplement Ads Bad for this Site?
     One Woman's Feedback on Woman of the Month

Lying Men make Women Crazy
First - what is up with the "angrywoman" feedback link? Don't you think that that alone will put many women on the defensive? Why not just a "woman feedback link'?

About “control” - one of the things midlifebachelor.com does not address which I think is important concerns 'lying or misrepresenting' to get what you want - because I think that is part of the whole control issue. I think that in many cases lying or misrepresenting something is one key reason why a man winds up with a 'crazy' (i.e. very pissed off) woman. If you manipulate/misrepresent/outright lie to 'get' something from a woman, then you really are opening the door for the woman to react in a way that no one is going to enjoy.

You pointed out well in your column about older women knowing what they want - but it is just as true they know what they DON'T want, and their tolerance for dishonesty is much less. Speaking from my own experience, I have lived 41 years of life and, at this age, my rose colored glasses are well and truly off (I have great faith in people but I also see people as they are). I have a fairly astute built-in BS meter and find that people who are trying to 'get' something from me (i.e. take something without being honest about it), will 'trip' my meter faster than just about anything else. I would much rather a man tell me what he wants from me, even if its just sex; if he isn't a total slimeball about it, I will respect that much more than a man who tries to 'get' sex from me (there is an assumption made there that he is so much more clever than me - an assumption that tends to push me in the direction of showing him what an idiot he really is). And, yes, I have reacted with anger and disgust when I find a man trying to snow me - it shows a lack of respect not only for me but for himself as well. Lorrie (Jefferson, Wisconsin), age 41

MidlifeBachelor.com Response
First – on the angrywomanfeedback@midlifebachelor.com email address (shown on Contact page), I was wondering when someone would notice that. It took the world two months before someone finally said something ;o) I don’t mean to insult anyone – that is purely my own deranged sense of humor that came up with that. Do you really think I should remove it, or is it maybe kind of funny? ;o)

Concerning your feedback about lying or deception by a man in order to control a woman – you are correct, I completely ignore that subject … but the reason I ignore it is because I do not advocate lying or deception. True – some men (and women) are liars. My own experience with people like that is that eventually their true colors show … and they get caught in their own lies. For men, the situations are a little different. For example, I have dated women in the past who were more interested in how much money I would spend on them versus anything else – these are the “gold digger” type … which fit into the High Maintenance formal category in the Fundamental Truths section. I can pick those types out pretty quickly – their shelf life is short around my house ;o)

For women, as you state – men are more likely to lie to them in order to get into their pants. And yes – I think most men would agree that this would justifiably piss most women off. So I agree with you 100%.

Why Women / People in General Are Crazy
Well, I definitely understand a little more as to why women and people in general are crazy. We all just sit around thinking about ourselves and what we can get from other people instead of what can we give. That's why I love these classes I've been taking so much. They really empower people to understand themselves better, and how the world actually works. We create everything in our lives, the good and the bad. We set up every single situation that just unfolds before us. Control isn't the issue from my perception. It's more just aligning your life with possibilities that you create, which we've been doing all along, but realizing that you have the say in creating those possibilities is the key to having our lives unfold as we plan them to. Lisa Long (Denton, TX), age 26 [Lisa asked to be identified by name - which we don't do unless specifically requested.]

MidlifeBachelor.com Response
We fully agree with you, Lisa.  And for the record - we don't think you are a crazy woman.   [Lisa was addressing a key point that is made under the Fundamental Truth's section - that Women are Crazy.]   Okay - so maybe they are not all crazy ... maybe in many cases it is just that men think differently, and so women appear crazy to men.  Some women are seriously crazy though. ;o)


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