Fundamental Truth #7:
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Types of Women - DULLARD

Dullard woman
Types of Woman - Dullard
A dullard is someone who is just flat out dull, boring, uninteresting, and probably uninterested in many things.  They usually lack a colorful personality, and also typically have low self-esteem.  As a midlife bachelor, you can date a dullard - just be prepared to be bored.  And be prepared for the fact that YOU will always need to create all of the excitement in the relationship, as dullard women are followers, not leaders.  In the past, when I have discovered myself dating a woman who is boring and dull, I have privately nicknamed her “Betty Boring”.   And when we as a couple have together become extremely boring together, I have referred to us as "Bob and Betty Boring".  When I used the ";Bob and Betty Boring" reference openly, my dullard girlfriends did not get especially upset with me - primarily because I've always been a big joker, and they came to expect something like that from me.  Plus I was referring to both of us - not just her ... and that makes a difference.  But privately - I knew she was really the boring one!

Don't confuse a dullard with someone who just has COMPLETELY DIFFERENT INTERESTS than you - because that is completely unrelated.  [If you and a woman have absolutely no common interests, then unless you are temporarily having great sex with her - you should probably quit the relationship (since you have nothing in common but your "parts").]  A woman with some different interests is fine - that makes her interesting in my book.  But a woman who is interested in nothing is a dullard! Let's look at a couple of examples to help you as a midlife bachelor differentiate between a dullard versus someone who is just different.

I'll start with the dullard.  The sister of a female friend of mine arranged for me to meet a very pretty younger girlfriend of hers who happened to work in the same insurance department at a local bank.  I wasn't expecting much from this introduction because previous blind dates had been consistent wastes of my time.  But I remember walking into the bank, and then meeting this woman - and WOW was she ever hot stuff.  She was about ten years younger than me, olive skin, nice full lips, great smile, and a great-looking rack - hot dog, I was thrilled.  Since this was just a "Hello - how are you"-type introduction, it only lasted maybe five or ten minutes ... just long enough for each of us to check the other out.  The sister of the female friend had vouched for both of us to the other already - and now that I had seen this woman, I thought "Yep - I would definitely go out with her".  And so I did - I took her out several times, and each time I found myself struggling to keep the conversation moving.  It seemed that Tabitha (that was her name) was very attractive, but she had very little to say.  Now don't get me wrong - sometimes a quiet woman can be an enormous blessing ... but what I was reading from her went further than just quiet.  She really did not do anything except work ... she was not really interested in shopping (huh?) ... she didn't have any hobbies or play any sports (huh?) ... and pretty much all she did was watch TV when she wasn't working.  I did take her and her 5 year old son out jet skiing once, and the child screamed bloody murder - and Tabitha told me she wouldn't want to do that again.  I remember thinking to myself, "what exactly floats this woman's boat?"  No - I didn't sleep with her ... after a few dates, I just couldn't keep our conversations going any longer, as I had run out of things to say.  She was so dull that the only thing I could do was ABANDON SHIP - which is a great strategy for a midlife bachelor to pursue in cases like this.

How to Meet and Date a Wealthy Man or Woman

Here's a different kind of example.  At work I met this very smoking hot Latina engineer named Trish.   She had big eyes, full lips, and was very intelligent.  She was the hottest female electrical engineer I've ever met - so hot that I found myself stumbling in my words around her (which is embarrassing).  To make a long story short, I was able to get her out for several dinner dates.  As I got to know her, it turned out that she was pretty much the polar opposite of me.  She was not materialistic whereas I am extremely materialistic.  She liked older beater automobiles, and was not impressed with my brand-new BMW M3 ... which I found very odd.  One really big difference between us came out during our first dinner date - she told me that she had a very large tattoo on her ass, and that it extended up from her leg, and around to her back.  I was somewhat in disbelief because Electrical Engineers are not typically tattooed - so I had her show me this monster tattoo ... and sure enough, it was huge.  [It was also a huge turn off for me - but I figured I would at least get her in the sack before passing further judgment (because she was so hot).]  The next dinner date with Trish came, and after dinner we walked around downtown Brea, CA - and wandered together into a bookstore.  She gravitated over to the magazine rack, and began looking at one of the hard-core tattoo rags on the shelf ... and started pointing out to me which ones she thought were cool, and which type she was thinking about to cover her back.  Cover her back?  I couldn't just sit there and lie to the woman by telling her that I thought heavily tattooed women are sexy ... so I told her what I was thinking at the time, that I couldn't possibly understand why anyone other than a rock star would do that to themselves, and that I thought it looked really ghetto.  You should have seen Trish's face - she was so angry with me.  I got no kiss goodnight - nothing.  And once again, I pursued the ABANDON SHIP strategy ... which was entirely appropriate because I just couldn't go along with this woman's interests.  So the point here is that Trish was NOT a dullard - she had interests ... those interests were just so different than mine that it made continuation of our dating ridiculous.  Boy, she was hot though.  My message here - don't confuse a dullard with someone who has interests that are extremely different than yours ... but recognize that the end-result is often the same as with a dullard, and that is that these relationships are often doomed.

Okay - so the psycho illustration of Mia continues.  Mia was a single mom, and was not receiving any child support.  She lived in the poor part of town, and drove an older car.  She asked me to come over, and that she would make me dinner - but she only had hamburger helper, with no hamburger.  To me this sounded like she might appreciate some help - so on my way over, I purchased a couple of packages of ground sirloin ... one for that night, and one for her and her son on a different night.  When I showed up with the meat, she had a fit - she said she didn't need any fucking handouts!  I explained to her that I was just trying to help out, and she did wind up using the meat ... but whole evening was weird because she had bitched me out so badly when I first arrived.  When it came time for me to leave, she walked me out to my car ... and when I tried to give her a kiss, she told me "Not in front of my son, you idiot!"  Her son was inside playing a video game, and I was only looking for a peck, not a make out session ... so as I drove away, I was 100% positive that this girl was absolutely psycho, and I never called her again.

Everything that happened with Mia occurred right away - the signs of psychosis were very obvious, and any midlife bachelor would have to be blind not to notice them.  Sometimes the signs can take quite some time to surface - as is the case of one of my earliest girlfriends, Michele.  Michele was a very good-looking, very intelligent blonde that I had met in my youth.  She and I dated, and wound up in bed together very quickly.  The sex was absolutely fantastic - and I couldn't get enough of her ... we were always knocking it out any chance we could.  After the newness of the relationship started to wear off, I began to notice that Michele had a pretty bad temper at times.  She didn't yell at people in public (as in the Tiffany example), rather her anger was directed pretty much at me only, and would build up over time.  Her anger would accumulate, and then just about anything would set her off - and she would actually punch me in the face, like a man!  I had never seen anything like this before - ever ... so I was unsure how to handle it.  I never hit her back - but what I did do (when I saw the punch coming) was stop her fist with my hand, and twirl her around into a bear hug until she calmed down.  Her behavior alarmed me so much that I insisted she go to a psychologist for therapy ... which she did.  But that violent behavior always came back.  I thought about calling the police - but friends had told me that anytime you call the police in a domestic violence situation, the man always goes to jail ... plus I thought it would look a little silly of me telling a police officer that this hot little blonde was abusing me - it just sounded bad.  Fortunately, she dumped me before things got any worse.   [I've never had any other girlfriend ever behave violently toward me.]

You can see from these examples the different symptoms of a woman being psycho, and the various timeframes in which this behavior emerges.  The bottom line - as a midlife bachelor, you've got to keep your eyes and ears open ... you've got to watch these women like a hawk, and know what you are getting yourself into.  Sure - you can continue dating a psycho woman ... but there will come a time when you may regret it.  My advice is that you deal with it earlier rather than later, and jettison any psycho woman you find yourself dating.  Your next girlfriend is not likely to be as psycho!  Next, please!



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