Fundamental Truth #7:
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High maintenance woman
Types of Women - High Maintenance
"High Maintenance" can mean many things.  Sometimes the term "high maintenance" is used synonymously with what I later refer to as a "showgirl", also known as an "attention whore".   But I believe the showgirl / attention whore type is distinct and different from what I'm calling "high maintenance" ... although in some cases a woman who is "high maintenance" is also a "showgirl".  Let me differentiate between my interpretations of the two.  "High maintenance" refers to a woman who requires you to expend a lot of money and/or effort in order to make her happy ... whereas the requirements of a "showgirl" are more emotional rather than monetary or physical - the showgirl needs more interaction with or attention from you.  I'll go into more detail later on the characteristics of a showgirl/attention whore - but this is probably good for now.

A woman who is "high maintenance" is typically what I call "foo foo"  A foo-foo woman is usually very good-looking, and goes to great lengths to maintain or enhance her appearance.  These women usually have perfect hair and perfect makeup ... they usually have their nails done at least once a week or so ... they prefer to relax in a salon or spa-type setting while getting a facial, and they typically overspend on clothes and shoes, in particular.  They also usually wax their body hair - including their bikini area ... oh yeah!  A foo foo woman is also more likely to have cosmetic surgical procedures - such as breast enhancements, laser skin treatments, chemical peels, etc. Sounds great, huh?  I personally enjoy foo foo women quite a bit!

Foo foo is one typical component of a "high maintenance" woman.  The other characteristics of high maintenance include (eventually) the reality that you are likely to wind up PAYING for some or all of what I just described as foo foo attributes!  What I'm saying here is that "high maintenance" more often than not implies that you (the boyfriend of the high maintenance woman) will financially subsidize the appearance and lifestyle of your woman in some way.  Lifestyle subsidy refers to the cost of keeping the woman happy - and could include things like dining only at fine restaurants, staying at the most expensive hotels, going to the most expensive cosmetic surgeons, owning an expensive car, shopping at expensive stores, etc.  I'm not saying any of this is bad - it is just something to consider when evaluating a potential new girlfriend.  Can you afford her?  Do you want to afford her?  Is she really worth it?

How to Meet and Date a Wealthy Man or Woman

Here are several examples of "high maintenance".   I once briefly dated a woman who is from what I would call "old money" in the area that I live.  She was always used to the best of everything ... fine dining, pricy wine, first class everything.  Now I would not regard myself as a cheapskate, but I realized early on when I first started dating her that I would need to consult my financial planner before seeing her more than once a week ... because she always insisted on going to the best restaurants, and would order the $100 bottle of wine. My typical dinner bill with her came out to be around $200, and that was without going anywhere else!  One night out each week would cost me $300-$400, depending on what we did and where we went.  For me at that particular time, I could afford it - but I thought it was too much.  I remember thinking that I could date a handful of ordinary women for the same money.  Plus this woman did not put out - and at first that pissed me off.  After a few weeks however, I thought it was probably better not to sleep with her - as that might have drawn me in closer, and cost me even more money!  Of course, what happened was that she dumped me after a month or two for some rich doctor ... and I was totally fine with that.

My long-term very foo foo girlfriend was also fairly high maintenance. When she moved in with me, I was informed that all my wonderful comfortable bachelor furniture was going to have to go.   And after new carpet, new bathroom fixtures, and all-new very high-end furniture - I found myself $30,000 poorer (in just a few months mind you).  Then her car (an older-model Saturn) was stolen from outside my home - and I felt obligated to get her a new one ... so of course she chose a Lexus!  When we went on our first vacation to Cancun, she wanted us to stay at the Ritz Carlton.  When I agree to take her shopping for clothes or shoes ... it is off to Nordstrom we go.  Now I'm definitely not complaining - I actually did not mind doing any of these things for her, or for us as a couple ... but it all falls under the category of "high maintenance" to be sure!  And I'd much rather be with a high maintenance woman versus anything else ... the opposite maybe being a third world woman who carries huge buckets of water on her head for miles!

As a midlife bachelor, you are probably in the peak of your earning years - and assuming that you have not lost everything in your divorce, you can probably afford one of these high maintenance women.  You've got to decide for yourself if the high maintenance type is right for you.  Trust me - they are not bad ... some of the other types can be much, much worse, such as the next type "PSYCHO".



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