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The Midlife Bachelor Personal Makeover

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If you have not already read the section of this site entitled "Some Fundamental Truths about Women and Midlife Dating Today", you should probably do so, either now or at some point. In Fundamental Truths, we essentially surveyed the landscape of women and many of the associated dating issues that one can expect to find in the world today as a midlife bachelor.    "Fundamental Truths" really described what is out there – not how to put yourself into the middle of it.    This section entitled, "The Midlife Bachelor Personal Makeover", backs up a bit – it assumes that maybe you have not dated in a while, and that you could use some advice on how to essentially “look the part” of datable man who women will want to go out with.   I’m not saying that you are not already a great guy the way you are right now.   And I’m not suggesting that you need to change into something you are not in order to get a damn date – no.   What I am saying is that EVEN A FERRARI NEEDS A TUNE-UP ONCE IN A WHILE … and a lot of midlife bachelors could also use a tune-up.   Hey – it never hurts to take a step back, and look at the basics of your appearance, and how you generally conduct yourself.   If not for dating, then possibly for just a good general personal reset or reboot.   The bottom line is – women are typically attracted to men who look nice, and who exude good karma … and that is where I’m going in this section.   You do not need to be a good-looking guy – Lord knows that I’m not the prettiest apple on the tree myself … but I am saying that paying attention to one’s appearance will do nothing but help you.

Physical appearance is just one part of the midlife bachelor tune-up.   What you do and say (or don’t say) as a midlife bachelor also has a direct impact on your date-ability.    One has to be cognizant of the implications of everything one is doing and saying – because women base their opinions of you on what THEY THINK you are saying or doing (versus what YOU THINK you are saying or doing).   In your mind, you could be the nicest guy in the world, but if you are constantly saying negative things – then women are going to think you are a real downer.   So you have to always check yourself – you’ve got to reassess the strategy and tactics concerning what comes out of your mouth especially.   If you are getting a lot of first dates, but hardly any subsequent dates – my bet is that you are conversationally challenged.   [If you are not getting any FIRST dates, then you may have both appearance challenges and conversation challenges.]   You get the idea.   You can learn all of this by paying close attention to yourself AND by paying close attention to what friends of yours go through.   I have learned a tremendous amount by watching what my single friends do and say, and how it affects the success of their midlife bachelorhood.  Plus it is often easier to watch others and recognize what they are doing – and learn from it (versus you making the same mistakes that they do).   Pooling together as much collective knowledge on the subject is what I advocate.   This collective knowledge is one reason behind the creation of this website.   Together we are strong!

Next >>> Personal Appearance 2.0 - Look the Part


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Section Index (auto-expands to right as browser widens >>)
The Midlife Bachelor Personal Makeover
   Personal Appearance Rev 2.0 – look the part!
          Personal Hygiene 101
            Hygiene Challenges I've Seen
                Facial hair
                Facial complexion
                Finger nails and toe nails
                Overall cleanliness
                Cologne and deodorant
                Body hair
                Pubic hair
          Dress for Success – Fashion Ensemble 101
                New Clothes – Formal, Casual, or Somewhere in Between?
                Shoes, Socks, and Belt
          Fat and Happy?  What about Weight?
   Attitude Adjustment / Mental Makeover Rev 2.0
         Bad Karma / Good Karma
         Makeover Message – Spread Good Karma
                Recognize the good in everything and everyone
                Not complain but rather find solutions
                Try to smile, and say something positive
                Remain calm in dramatic situations
                Don’t appear cheap
         The Dangers of Insecurity
            Failure to look a woman in the eyes
            Constantly asking a woman out
            Calling too often
            Being too nosey
            Assuming too much about the status of a relationship
         Avoid the Ruts
                The No Date rut 
                The Wrong Girlfriend rut
         Know when to Talk and When to Listen
            Get her talking about what she is interested in
            Don't talk too much about yourself
         Learn from Others and from Yourself