increasingly annoy her. Maybe it is the challenge that appeals to you? I've been in situations like that myself in the past - and I found that after reaching the desired goal, it somehow wasn't as great as I'd envisioned ... sometimes the expectations exceed reality, if that makes sense. A better way to think of this is - how can you best expend your energy?   I'd say that chasing a new woman who is visibly interested in you would be a much better choice.

Another way that you could think about this is - what if the situation was reversed? What if you had a room-mate who was very attracted to you, and who you wanted nothing to do with? Would it not get annoying fast if she kept pressing you for sex? You'd likely start to avoid her, etc.

And yes - you probably do need to change your living arrangements ... but I'd suggest doing your best to preserve your friendship with your room-mate because that friendship is obviously important to you. Just tell her that you feel like you simply want to live alone ... and that it is nothing personal, but she needs to find different accommodations, and give her a deadline of say, six weeks. Good luck, JJ. You need to join our Midlife Forum here, and share some of your experiences. Let me know how things work out, okay?

UPDATE - I just tossed this issue out to our Midlife Forum, here is the discussion thread link

July 30, 2009 UPDATE - JJ wrote in with the following update, "She moved out and decided not to keep our friendship, which saddened me deeply. She was the love of a lifetime, and didn't want a lifetime of love. I will miss her."